Sawdust Enthusiast Gifts

'Remember, I deduct one grade point for every splinter.'

'Sander's a bit high isn't it?'

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

Bad fake tan day.

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

Fight or Flight

"Hello coastguard, it's my husband, he's beached"

Sunbathers.

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'I keep very close touch with the office in case things are running too smoothly without me.'

'we must be near the water because I see a sea gull.'

'Have a nice weekend, Alfred.'

"Honsetly Fred, we just got here and you want to go home."

"I only need shade for my wine."

"Well Earned Vacation"

I've given you 110 for ten years, like you asked. Now I'm taking that year off that I've earned!

"Wifey! Wifey! I've found the fountain of youth!"

Whittler's Mother.

Vacation Bus Photo

"This is perfect. I could stay like this for the next five seconds."

Holiday Aerobics.

"Noooooooooooo!"

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

'Think, Billy - where did you bury Dad?'

"How's it look back there?"

'We must have everything... this is all that's left!'

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know what your office staff are doing?'

'I'm taking vacation next week. And wouldn't you know it, the wife wants to go on a cruise.'

'If you want to hear the ocean, press one.'

"Yipeee!"

"It's a Mexican Wave!!"

Shrimpsea welcomes car-full drivers.

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."