Sandwich Savant Gifts

'Let me know when you're ready for the Great American tuna fish sandwich.'

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

'Good buffet?'

"I was going to make dinner but we are all out of peanut butter and jelly."

'Hank, I don't think this a good time to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.'

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

"Rye? You're not gonna believe who I just ran into..."

I'd like it sliced thin for sandwiches.

'You're in trouble. Your confidential memo went toxic and so did that tuna salad.'

A curl of sandwiches

Sandwich Bar.

Sandwich snob.

"You're supposed to be a watch dog, so go watch something else for a change!"

"This means that my dad is climbing Everest with my cheese and pickle sandwich!"

Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

Holiday Gifts 2020

"House red, sir?"

"We kiss a lot of frogs so that you find your prince."

"Nice going, Larry. They're going in after your liverwurst and sardine sandwich that fell behind the fridge last month."

'Real? No. They're all made out of soy and tofu. We wanted to crack the meatless industry up a few notches.'

'My old friend here, Hiro, is opening a chain of sushi bars exclusively for lawyers. It's called Sosumi.'

The doctor says I have man flu. - 'Did he give you any medicine?' - 'No. He said I should 'make the most of it'' - 'Eh?' - 'I feel soooo ill. Can you get me a sandwich?' - 'Gah!! Men are ridiculous' -

'Thinner!'

'It's commendable that you only ate one slice of pizza, but when you're only cutting it in half...'

"The way I heard it, after fifteen years of doing cricket teas, his wife finally snapped."

"I don't want them to sniff out our hostile takeover plans. Maybe we should stop wearing our power ties on Casual Friday."

Closing Laugh D.I.Y.

Large hi fi.

As we discussed, I'm off in the afternoons this week. Hence the nice outfit. It's a handful of strategic meetings and mixers for investors of The Infant Restaurant Critic. Yell. Not Yelp, but Yell. Y'know, it's the website that publishes make-or-break restaurant reviews from a screaming infant. Mixer. You're the infant's mother? Cool. I prefer founding partner or seed investor.

"I love a man with an untrimmed crust."

'Larry, that tie is not your friend.'

'Please help yourselves to the salad bar, folks.'

Clancy Strip: At the Suit Sale