Supermarket Savant Gifts

Alphabet Soup - Now in LARGE PRINT.

'I see a new Tesco store is always a good standby.'

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

Binge Watch

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

"Ultimately, we realized we share too many app subscriptions not to make it work."

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

'Took calcium supplements for years without paying for them.'

'I don't believe in hoarding cash and gold Dad: I invest in shares online...'

Sandwich snob.

Piggy Bank ATM

'Turn we women loose in the malls - that'll stimulate the economy.'

Supermarket 'Men, temporary lobotomy patch'

'The forever stamps I purchased at 42 cents are now 44 cents. That's an annual apprciation of 2 which is more than you earned on your investment portfolio.'

"Why does your men's clothing store need a loan?" "During the pandemic sales of pants have dropped way off."

'Mary, you must give me your stuffing recipe.'

I'd like it sliced thin for sandwiches.

'You're in trouble. Your confidential memo went toxic and so did that tuna salad.'

"I see that there's an excellent sale on diddly-squat at the Zilchtown Mall in Nowheresville, New Jersey."

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

Till malfunction

'My old friend here, Hiro, is opening a chain of sushi bars exclusively for lawyers. It's called Sosumi.'

'Blimey, you must have charged for the trolley as well!'

"And when you've saved up enough money, what are you going to say in in your full-page ad in the New York Times?"

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

"Just groceries? Oh I see..."

"This means that my dad is climbing Everest with my cheese and pickle sandwich!"

'Let me know when you're ready for the Great American tuna fish sandwich.'

'Urgent customer announcement. Is there an EPOS systems programmer in the shop?'

Scrooge and his piggy bank

'Hank, I don't think this a good time to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.'

Vitamin D