Shopping Savant Gifts

"Just groceries? Oh I see..."

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

Cut Price

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

A women in a shoeshop.

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

New Suit.

"I shop, therefore I am."

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

GQ Magazine: Stay at Home Special.

"No, we can't get you a new toy every time we go shopping."

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

A young couple selects items from a shop.

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

'Let's go and make some unfunded spending committments.'

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

Tie Rolls

"If at first you don't succeed, buy, buy again."

"It's a nice halo and all, but I'm not sure it matches my outfit."

'Running your own business means being self-made, unfortunately it also means finding out what you're made of!'

"'IF modom decides to change it' - don't you mean WHEN??"

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

'That's the new guy. He writes our 'shuck-and-jive' press releases.'

It was a good chance to get together and talk shop.