Restaurant Savant Gifts

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

Felix Mendelssohn

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

Sir Edward Elgar

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

"Ah — excellent catsup."

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

'I don't believe in hoarding cash and gold Dad: I invest in shares online...'

Sandwich snob.

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

"We kiss a lot of frogs so that you find your prince."

Anton Bruckner.

'I'm sorry, I can't reveal my sauce.'

'You're in trouble. Your confidential memo went toxic and so did that tuna salad.'

"Chef keeps the secrets of his sauces close to his chest"

'Coming to you direct from table nine; 'the polenta is cold'.'

"It's new. It's called a pre-tip. You pay me now and I'll actually bring your food before it's cold!"

"Is this the wobbly table? I'll put my screenplay under this leg."

'Ketchup? You know that's an insult to the chef, right?'

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

Cattle barons for world domination.

"And I recommend to not get sauced."

"Okay. Two Buffalo Burgers comin' right up"