Salon Savant Gifts

'We're cutting staff - I'll keep your details on our file.'

"Can you make her look less like her passport photo?"

Foxtail. A client is pleased with her new hairstyle. It's complete genius. The hairdresser hopes she doesn't notice the truth.

'Alright! Alright! So I made a mistake!'

Afro hairdressing.

The apes make advances in grooming techniques.

Felix Mendelssohn

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

New Suit.

"We don't observe 'casual Fridays' here."

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

'That's the new guy. He writes our 'shuck-and-jive' press releases.'

Sir Edward Elgar

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

"It's a nice halo and all, but I'm not sure it matches my outfit."

Tie Rolls

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

The Tragedy of Prosperity

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

Poetry repairman

"It's just a beginning, I suppose, but I'm feeling really good about my clothes."

Choosing What To Wear.

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

GURLERS

"Getting a Brazilian has been nothing like I expected."

"I want it to look good, but not ill-gotten-gains good."

'Now that's what I call a beautiful fit.'

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

The Music Lover.

"Everything I do I do with panache. I even say panache with panache."

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"May I make a wardrode suggestion, Harris."

"We kiss a lot of frogs so that you find your prince."

Champagne Tasting.