Salon Savant Gifts

'We're cutting staff - I'll keep your details on our file.'

"Can you make her look less like her passport photo?"

Foxtail. A client is pleased with her new hairstyle. It's complete genius. The hairdresser hopes she doesn't notice the truth.

'Alright! Alright! So I made a mistake!'

Afro hairdressing.

The apes make advances in grooming techniques.

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

Felix Mendelssohn

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

New Suit.

"We don't observe 'casual Fridays' here."

GQ Magazine: Stay at Home Special.

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

Sir Edward Elgar

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

'That's the new guy. He writes our 'shuck-and-jive' press releases.'

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

Tie Rolls

"It's a nice halo and all, but I'm not sure it matches my outfit."

The Tragedy of Prosperity

"Wait, mister Samson. The manager said he'll give you a full refund and a year's worth of free stylings."

Poetry repairman

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

"It's just a beginning, I suppose, but I'm feeling really good about my clothes."

Choosing What To Wear.

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

'Now that's what I call a beautiful fit.'

The Music Lover.

"Getting a Brazilian has been nothing like I expected."

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

GURLERS

"I want it to look good, but not ill-gotten-gains good."

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

"Everything I do I do with panache. I even say panache with panache."