Sandwich Savior Gifts

"Nice going, Larry. They're going in after your liverwurst and sardine sandwich that fell behind the fridge last month."

"You've got the five seconds to get off that cheese sandwich or I send in a swat team."

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

Super Heroes.

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'Kimble, I'm going to give you a chance at purchasing - nip over to the cafe and get me a cheese and pickle sandwich.'

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

Filling the Missile Gap

"Aww geez... peanut butter and jellyfish again."

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

Wow, Ernie, another previously undiscovered tomb. And it has some unusual images. Is that a picture of the first sandwich? A thumbs up is next to it. The first "like"! Here's a drawing of a family and a heart has been added. The first emoji! This bird looks exactly like one we saw in the last tomb. The first retweet. Could this be the first social media? Yes! And this is how they scrolled!

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

Jelly I.V.

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

A sick sandwich is in the hospital and is getting a transfusion on new Maya and Zesty Mustard.

Orville Wright, not sure he wants to eat airline food, brings a sandwich to his historic first flight.

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

"Genetic engineering has made us disease resistant."

Batman and Reuben

"I'm a retired doctor."

"I just knew there had to be a better use for tomatoes than making boring old sandwiches."

Armstrong, an unmarked truck just delivered a pallet of mystery meat. Turkey. It doesn't look like turkey. It looks more like some sort of dehydrated pigeon. What's it matter? If we slap it in a sandwich, smother it in "gravy," and label it "turkey," customers won't know the difference. Wait, did you just think quotes around the word gravy? "no."

Sandwich snob.

A lot of attention gets paid to the Earl of Sandwich, and rightfully so, but let's not forget to show some respect for that neglected Lord of Lunch, the Viscount of Potato Salad.

"I'm going across the street for a sandwich and coffee. Can I get you something?"

'Your French dip, sir.'

"Sorry, you ran out of wishes. A ham and cheese on rye counts as three."