Sales Tactics Humorist Gifts

"Reliability?? But what about the dunamic color combo and the satisfying exhaust notes?"

"Thank you, Harris - I get the picture."

'Our strategy is perfect! This is the customers' fault - they don't think the way WE do!'

"These are magic beans, my boy. Their value comes from growth and scale, not revenue."

These Sales Reps get more aggressive every year.

The company's marketing strategy became increasingly sophisticated.

I was hoping you might convince him by demonstrating the quality of the product.

'I lost my shoe, but I got my foot in the door.'

Carpet salesman, "There's a bit of tyre damage, but not so anyone would notice."

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

A building covered in signs reading 'boats'.

'A telemarketing call for you, Sir.'

Man asking why the lamp in the picture doesn't come with the bicycle

'CROOOAX! If we ever want to sell this damned parrot, we better not anybody what he has done to his previous owners... CROOOAX! If we ever want...'

"This cream puff was owned by a little old lady who only settled on Sundays."

'Blast it's raining!'

"Actually, the 24/7 Roadside Assistance kinda makes up for the 24/7 vehicle depreciation."

Super and Super Duper Vitamins.

'All profits go directly to charity'

'Our motto is, 'We'll do anything to sell a car!' but he really means it.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

'For kicking our salesman down the stairs, we take 10 euros extra charge, sir!'

Holds leftovers, easy to carry... Gotta say, he almost had me. Right up to th 'Keeps food fresh' part. What a waste of a good idea.

"Faked by a snake selling rakes."

F&E Cafeteria. All you can stomach $12.99. "All you can eat" would sound more appetizing.

"They're becoming very pushy these doorstep salesmen."

"What 'Do-not-knock' list?"

Pushy Salesmen

Sales Secrets of the Clerk who Talked you into Buying this Book

Roy's no soliciting signs being sold by door to door salesman.

'Okay, okay!... I'll buy a few pegs!'

"Nope, no airbags. But did I mention the heavy-duty seatbelts?"

'I've been able to change their answer from 'never' to 'when pigs fly'.'

Pharmaceutical sales rep Jules Halm loved to sport his 'jacket of 1,000 pills.'

Six hundred quid for a storage case! Yes sir, but you get a free router.