Salad Fanatic Gifts

"Do I like arugula? I love arugula!! Some of the best beaches in the world are there."

'You know, that's really bleu cheese and not ranch. It's a cross dressing.'

'I'm on a very strict diet!'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'Like death by salad.'

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

Surprise in the salad bowl

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

'I realize it's not on the menu but I'm on a diet and I'd like an air fern salad.'

Mrs. Robot attempts to improve her family's diet.

"What!?! I like a nice salad every now and then, too. What of it?"

"It's been 10 years Martha, why are we still eating quinoa?"

'Diet considerations.'

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

"I feel like I'm cosplaying as a salad bar."

Chef picking salad leaves from a hanging basket outside his restaurant.

Vegetables VS Junk Food.

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."

"More croutons, sir?"

"Waiter, can you find out if this hair in my arugula salad is locally harvested?"

Cinema with a salad bar in its lobby.

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways … Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my ladle can reach … When feeling hungry for the crunch of crouton and ideal lettuce. I love thee to the level of every day's most quiet need ... by cheesy bread and chicken wing. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I eat of thee freely, and then, at four, 'tis goodnight. O Sizzler salad bar, how do I love thee? I'm hungry.

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

'I didn't know it was a one-trip salad bar!'

All-You-Should-Eat Buffet

" 'Unlimited salad bar' sounded better on the menu."

"Good morning, Mother! We made you a desk salad."

'If a tomato is a fruit, why don't you get it in fruit salad?'

Free salad bar.