Salad Enthusiasts Gifts

Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely.

I can't believe I ate all that kale for nothing.

"I can't believe I ate all that salad for nothing."

'On second thoughts I think I'll have salad.'

Well, the cat guide says, 'If your cat brings home a dead animal, consider it a gift of love - he's 'feeding' you.' Hmph... Nothing in here about a salad, though...

Life is a one trip salad bar.

"Now that's what I'm talking about."

Pete's Salad Bar.

'Boy, when they say one trip salad bar, they MEAN one trip salad bar!'

I'll have the tossed salad.

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

"I'm vegetarian now, the next time you kill something can you pick me up a salad?"

"Sometimes I just want a nice salad."

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

'Like death by salad.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

'I realize it's not on the menu but I'm on a diet and I'd like an air fern salad.'

Surprise in the salad bowl

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

'Diet considerations.'

"It's been 10 years Martha, why are we still eating quinoa?"

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

"I feel like I'm cosplaying as a salad bar."

"May I take your plate or are you still nibbling?"

"What!?! I like a nice salad every now and then, too. What of it?"

Chef picking salad leaves from a hanging basket outside his restaurant.

"More croutons, sir?"

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."

Cinema with a salad bar in its lobby.