Rustic Retreat Explorer Gifts

Backwoods Cafe: Speciality - Peanut butter & Log Jam.

"Ironically, this is the living room."

A Good Batch.

"You go on in, I’m just going to catch up with the moon for a few minutes."

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

Those Were The Days

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

"The new house is almost ready!"

"I don't care what anybody says, coffee just tastes better in a tree stand. . ."

"Ernie's full service salon and day spa."

Tourist

Interpretive napping

"Excuse me sir, is this the environment..?"

"He's teaching me map skills, such as how to fold it."

'Frankly I'm all meditated out.'

'Another artisanal B&B.'

Early American Think tank

'Hey,that wasn't there yesterday,let's go check it out.'

'For the life of me I can't see how cooking over a fire, bathing under a spigot and sleeping on the ground can be fun!'

The Rudges' peaceful home

Spring Training

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

Looks like you put too much dosie in that doe, Earl.

Rustic Campgrounds.

"...And then beyond the lawn, a lily pool with fountains and..."

"You know what they say: if you can remember the Sixties then talk about them endlessly on BBC Four documentaries."

'Did you remember to lock the house?'

Pray it Don't Spry it.

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of working with goats are the hardest.'

"I found my old college classmates and my college uncovered my old tuition loans!"

'The paper screwed up the ad. It read 'Wanted: Hired Gun' rather than 'hired man'.'

"I moved out here for peace and quiet, but now I keep talking to myself."

Rustic Camping: No Water, Electric or Wi-Fi

'Mother, are you sure your marijuana use is purely medicinal?'

Ocean sounds $1.00