Rural Rider Gifts

Chase me, chase me cows.

Farm Humor.

"It seemed like miles to me!"

Lamb Noise.

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

"I always knew you'd come back."

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

"The Taco is good on the trail but where do I put the drink?"

'I guess you might call it a sort of penicillin reaction.'

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

'The country is awfully deep, but the falling is delightfully soft and safe'

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

'Yes, we have a very diversified economy around here.'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

A bit of Newlyn.

"Ok Lassie, cut out the smart arse bit and just herd the sheep."

"And when someone gets your goat, what do you suppose it is that keeps you from going and getting it back?"

"You're not a police dog, and that's not a crime scene."

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!

Fly-fishing. - Favourable wind and the trout rising as fast as possible.

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

How can you be so sure this is Farmer Phillip's Farm?

Gertie, the tree climbing has to stop!

'Oh Yeah! It's frosty! BOO-YAH!'

The Pooperrazzi

WHOA! Another 6! Erm...what's that mean?

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

Last Reception for 200 Miles.