Rural Literature Fan Gifts

'Make sure you don't ruffle him. He cornered the Hick Lit market.'

"They’re real."

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

Twitter that!

'Yes, we have a very diversified economy around here.'

"Ok Lassie, cut out the smart arse bit and just herd the sheep."

'They used to be called sheep, and they produced wool. Now they're some sort of bioengineered creatures, and they produce antibiotics.'

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!

Books*. *Batteries not included.

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

Welcome to the urban farm. A bit of country in the city.

'A lot of my stories involve milk.'

I've been doing sit-ups!

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

"Quick! Get your gun, Pa! Here come the suburbs."

Scrooge McCow

Stunt Fly flying through a cow.

'What's that smell?'

Barns

'Are you paying in cash, check, credit card or livestockfarm produce?'

Looks like you put too much dosie in that doe, Earl.

Close, but no cigar!

Nice six-pack!

Environment-Friendly books - all written within a 100-mile radius.

'The paper screwed up the ad. It read 'Wanted: Hired Gun' rather than 'hired man'.'

Cow cleaning his teeth with string.

Snow Cow

Junior's switch to electronic chewing tobacco was short-lived.

That's one harmonious butt hole!

'That's the sign of a good painting!'

'Got any cud flavour?'

I'm a Smart-Cow!