Rural Life Humorists Gifts

Cheshire Hayseed!

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

I fart more than that!

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

A Venus cow trap.

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

"Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're our only hope."

'It's negative attention ... as long as you keep asking why, they'll keep on doing it.'

Cow in a vest: Well, I think I look like Bruce Willis!

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

"In honor of your birthday I had your face tattooed to my ass."

"He keeps watching over our flock. I think it's a stalker."

'Is it ok if I just bring in some of our carpet?'

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

'What?... You wanted your horse SHOD!?'

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

COWS: Spare cow

'I met my wife on Faeces Book.'

Early American Think tank

Cow has caught a frisby in his udders

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

Model Village/Realistic Model Village.

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

'Of course there is room for advancement. You certainly can't go down from here.'

Nice six-pack!

Close, but no cigar!

"I stink... therefore, I am."

Junior's switch to electronic chewing tobacco was short-lived.

"Can you milk a cow?"

I think we need to lose the 'Singing Ringing Tree'!

Prank Cattle Calls. (mmph)