Rural Life Explorer Gifts

H2O

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

I wish I'd never bought them that swing!

Model Out-Of-Town Superstore

Better go and pick up the kids from the nursery.

"And when someone gets your goat, what do you suppose it is that keeps you from going and getting it back?"

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

Please Drove Carefully.

Farm Humor.

"It seemed like miles to me!"

Lamb Noise.

'Trickle or Spray!?'

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

"Static cling."

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

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"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

'The country is awfully deep, but the falling is delightfully soft and safe'

'Another nice thing about working here, they tend to promote from within.'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

Mummy?!

"Welcome to Randolph, Vermont. Don't even think of relocating here!"

"You're not a police dog, and that's not a crime scene."

Dogs and Chickens

A bit of Newlyn.

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

'There'll be a special meeting of the board concerning the recent generous contribution of stock.'