Runner's Humor Gifts

"We keep running for our lives: Wouldn't it be nice, just once, to go on a fun run?"

'Your shoe's untied.'

"They took my pellets, man, I been hitting' that lever al day, they took my PELLETS!"

'Think Basics.'

'After the big race the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

"Yeah, I'm a Roadrunner, but it is easier on my feet and joints if I run on the grass..."

"Hey, this is a marathon, not a sprint."

'Runners to your mark. Get set... wait! Lane three! Turn sideways!'

'Good morning, Doctor! I wonder if you'd mind taking a look at this pup.'

Annual 10K Fun Run

'Realist Trac, with 4 settings...'

Just for laughs, let's throw a few folks off course.

Henry followed the dress code at inappropriate times.

Raymond tries out his new sweat-diverting eaves trough.

'Let 'em go. They're joggers. Nothing but gristle and bones.'

After 10 years, the great potato race of 1997 was finally declared a tie.

"I'm done - I only jog far enough to burn off the cheesecake I had for breakfast."

"And that's why I avoid moisture-wicking sportswear."

'They must practice their pit stops for hours to get it as badly wrong as that.'

Finishing line cuts open athlete.

'Psst, I know a shortcut.'

Caution.

Jogger with Sweat Shop Shirt

"Looks like the trains aren't running again."

"How did the marathon go?"

Golly, only about ten bucks in charge...less than I thought.

Marathon winners.

"I'll race you the last inch."

"We caught him exercising at a rest stop."

"Hey! It was supposed to be a hare."

Shin splints. Next 5 miles.

"I don't think I can make the finish line, so I'm going back!"

'Nothing. Zip. Nada... Dude, none of these marathoners are carrying cigarettes!'

Although it wears very well, the Holland Running Shoe is not a favorite among marathon runners.

'Really? I'm a professional racer too...'