Runner Humorist Gifts

'Wait for me!'

Raymond tries out his new sweat-diverting eaves trough.

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

"They took my pellets, man, I been hitting' that lever al day, they took my PELLETS!"

'Think Basics.'

"Yes, you look presentable. Now get on!"

"Yeah, I'm a Roadrunner, but it is easier on my feet and joints if I run on the grass..."

La Tour 2007.

"Hey, this is a marathon, not a sprint."

'Really, this award has come as a great surprise...'

'Runners to your mark. Get set... wait! Lane three! Turn sideways!'

'Good morning, Doctor! I wonder if you'd mind taking a look at this pup.'

Just for laughs, let's throw a few folks off course.

Henry followed the dress code at inappropriate times.

Annual 10K Fun Run

'Realist Trac, with 4 settings...'

After 10 years, the great potato race of 1997 was finally declared a tie.

Finishing line cuts open athlete.

'They must practice their pit stops for hours to get it as badly wrong as that.'

"And that's why I avoid moisture-wicking sportswear."

"I'm done - I only jog far enough to burn off the cheesecake I had for breakfast."

'Psst, I know a shortcut.'

Caution.

Jogger with Sweat Shop Shirt

"We caught him exercising at a rest stop."

Shin splints. Next 5 miles.

"Hey! It was supposed to be a hare."

"I'll race you the last inch."

"Looks like the trains aren't running again."

Marathon winners.

"We keep running for our lives: Wouldn't it be nice, just once, to go on a fun run?"

'On your mark...'

"I don't think I can make the finish line, so I'm going back!"

'Nothing. Zip. Nada... Dude, none of these marathoners are carrying cigarettes!'

10k Corral.