Rug Aficionado Gifts

"The carpet really brings the room together."

"And while we're here, do you have a rug for my husband's head?"

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

Thatched roof car.

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"Working from home is a great idea, Dad. We'd just like to establish some kind of dress code."

"I'm surprised at you, Ted. You know we're not allowed to serve alcoholic beverages to dogs."

"Many of us are worrying, Brother Daniel, that you've become too clothes conscious."

'He wants a second opinion.'

"I like to come prepared for meetings."

A sign outside a bookstore reads: "Meet the people in the bookstore cafe staring at their laptops 2-4 p.m."

'The only game my Dad knows is playing possum.'

'My programmer doesn't understand me.'

"I warned you about playing at the tar pits."

'Oh Elias! It's simply the cutest bear rug I ever did see!'

"A high forhead can often be a sign that they've stolen a really big brain."

Mine Host.

'I'm a simple man really beneath the code words and the black ops and the multitude of fake passports.'

England.

'My husband's just getting some ready to show you.'

"This time it's curtains for you, Black Bart!"

Someone has had a hard day!

"Great news! They just bought a new rug we can throw up on!"

Alcohol Ingredients

No Dogs.

'Cheer up...'

Military General with numerals medals and uniform decorations with 'cont. on back' sign.

Edgar Allen Prozac

Edgar Allan Poe

'I must admit, I do look good in stripes.'

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

'Suddenly Jake was confronted by the dreaded raffler'

"Watch yourself, stranger. I've got an itchy trigger finger."