Rubbish Man Gifts

'And quit yelling, 'Finders keepers, losers weepers.''

'Cor, I had a right dickie belly last night Alf.'

Career Analyst "Well I've looked at your file and yes, your job is rubbish"

Daisy Diaper Service

"The key to success is knowing what people want. Too bad it isn't knowing what people don't want."

"You've opened my eyes to the most disgusting worldly delights."

'One day son, all this will be collected.'

We're polishing our brand.

"I miss being a kid. When I was little, my dad paid me for being good."

Mock cover of 'Landfill' magazine

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

"Instant coffee? Little plug-in water heater?? This new guy must be a real survivalist!"

'Jack's wife left him for the dustman.'

Adult Education Evening Class: How to sort your rubbish.

'True, I don't know a lot about art, but junk, I know!'

"If you can stand the cuteness, take a look at my cat."

"Tidy Tim."

Rubbish spoiling water falls

Anti-Litter Machine

'How about using a knife like everyone else?'

'Huh! There goes Sunday lunch!'

"Technically I have managed to get that big old sofa out the door..."

"The council want you to have this extra bin madam. It's not for putting rubbish into through - it's just to take up any unused space in your front garden."

Beware: Ditch Water.

"Don't call me at work. My gloves stink."

'Gesundheit!'

Garbage DNA

"Deals in junk....talks a load of rubbish."

Plane writing; 'Happy Garbage Day'. Garbage man says 'Three days after I dumped her, she won the lottery.'

'About the head scarf: This is a place of business. Might want to tone it down.'

"Hold on a minute."

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Deer Hunter?

hat training do you need to become a rubbish collector?