Rubbish Collectors Gifts

'Gesundheit!'

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

Utility Chic.

'Then a window popped up and asked, 'Are you sure you want to empty trash?' I shouldn't have clicked 'okeydokey.''

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

This is not what I had in mind when I joined the Council!

"You put your family in with the aluminum cans again, Mrs. Price."

"You've opened my eyes to the most disgusting worldly delights."

"You know, turning a hobby into a job kinda takes all the fun out of it."

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

'I found this copy of 'Atlas Shrugged' under his mattress!'

'One day son, all this will be collected.'

Typical...You don't see one for weeks then they all arrive together.'

'Look dear - the first skip of spring...'

"This isn't for me - it's for the economy."

"I stopped recycling after my garbage guy slipped me the number of the nearest AA branch."

The evolution of a woman's purse.

'Oh, you nut! I thought we agreed we weren't going to make a big fuss over birthdays anymore.'

The traveling Yard Sale.

"Come on, Baldo...get up. It's twenty to eleven."

How farmers get away w/ eating crackers in bed

"He thinks he's located a World War I torpedo boat. What's exciting at your house?"

'Jack's wife left him for the dustman.'

'Oh yeah! I guess you think your barge doesn't stink.'

"Hey, dump that in the East River where it belongs."

'True, I don't know a lot about art, but junk, I know!'

'Got anything with a dual muffler?'

'Must you eat without your shirt on? The crumbs falling into your navel are beginning to compost.'

An astronaut finds an abandoned shopping cart on the moon

Where There's Muck There's Brass.

"We're editing our collection of plastic bags."