Royal Counselor Gifts

"Swipe left." Henry VIII

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"It is we."

'I get the feeling you're wagging your tale on the outside and crying on the inside.'

"Have you tried biting him?"

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

"Seminary didn't prepare me for this."

"There are no bad dogs. Only good dogs who make bad choices."

'First of all, calm down - your allowed to be on the couch.'

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

Reign Man

King completes rubik's cube.

"The militant hard-liners are making demands, the fanatical zealots are issuing threats, and the moderate centrists are offering suggestions."

"Friend or foe?"

"And just how long have your felt confined by this 'invisible fence'?"

You have a lot of patients coming to your for counseling! Yeah, I just saw a supernova who is dealing with burnout. Later, I'll see Pluto about his inferiority complex and a black hole who wants to fill a void in its life. Then Hailey's Comet and his wife will discuss why he's rarely there for her. Since your practice went universal it just keeps expanding! You're so busy! Yeah, my head is spinning!

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

'I'm not saying he's unpopular, but the Secret Service won't let me wear spike heels.'

The King In The Rain.

So doctor, what you're saying is that all the time I thought she was a crazy cat lady, it was me who had mental health issues...

'Do you have an appointment?'

"He doesn't like dinosaurs."

"Your wife called again about that thing called love - I said you were dealing with it."

'I think Mr. Teddy's getting too dependent on me.'

The emotional rollercoaster of a Lab

'He's disappointed with the Queen's card - he wanted a rude one!'

'From left to right: witchfinder general, jester jocular and spouse peculiar.'

'How do you want me to answer that question, Norm? As an attorney, or as your best friend?'

Dog on couch at psychiatrist office talking about love and liver snacks