Royal Correspondent Gifts

King Charles III's coronation

"...And when he pops them in, you pop them back out again!"

"It is we."

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

'I suppose that's where things get ironed out.'

"Possible exception to Prince William's proposed halt on space travel." proposed halt on space travel."

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

Crooked Hillary... Pig... Sad!... Not a Ten!...

Reign Man

"Deal with it Your Majesty- Comedy is king!"

'I'm not saying he's unpopular, but the Secret Service won't let me wear spike heels.'

"I told the cook I would prefer that she use some kind of artificial blackbird substitute."

The King In The Rain.

"Friend or foe?"

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

Sally Jessy Raphael

'I did give your brother a job - he's keeping an eye out for forest fires.'

'A long-awaited government shake-up: A 'ditto-head' will replace a 'yes-man'...A 'croney' will replace an 'insider'...'

'He's disappointed with the Queen's card - he wanted a rude one!'

'Do you have an appointment?'

"And then at 3 you have a meeting with the royal pain in the butt."

'A whoopee cushion! — I'll bet Karl Rove is behind this somewhere!'

Jester Cries Over His Replacement

Football Royalty

"The good news today is that there is no news."

'Don't blame the King, Ma'am. This was all his divorce lawyer's idea.'

"I think perhaps the Minstrel Show doesn't hit quite the right tone."

'So what else can you do, besides reign?'

"Due to the financial state of the kingdom were turning the castle into a Bed & Breakfast & Ransom."

Breaking news

'No, no, no - I said do me a ship in a bottle'