Romantic Reparations Gifts

"Better get two dozen. She won't be able to hit you as hard with both arms full."

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

"I remember that game of Spin-the-Bottle like it was yesterday. It was love at firstspin."

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

'I can't talk to my wife - all she says is `Baaah! Baaah!`!

Wedding Wellies

"Wow! I must be dreaming!"

"When we were dating it was all wine, soft lights, and candy. So nothing's changed really."

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

We should talk...

"I thought you might like to hear how my love-making sounded when I was a younger man."

'Wow! Who knows what eroticism lurks in the heart of a sister.'

"I'd like to get something for my wife. Do you have any olive branches?"

'You know I can never stay mad at you. Get in here, ya big galoot.'

'You've never forgotten that Elsie Turner, have you George!'

"I was quite pleased to find a job which allows me to see more of my husband."

'It's both physical and chemical. She works in a lab.'

"I investigated your husband, Mrs Adams. He isn't cheating on you. In fact, I'm your husband. We've just really lost touch recently."

"If I remember correctly, you were the only one the dating agency had left over."

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"I remember it well, me in wig and gown, gazing down at you, a picture of innocence, standing in the dock."

'We've been through thick and thin. Tell me about the thin again.'

My first Boyfriend.

"Honey! Remember when we first met and you used to nibble my ear?"

"We never have any activities that make for cute anecdotes anymore."

"Remember the great cranberry scare of '59? And the cellular phone hysteria of '93? Ralph Nader's killer hot dog with the nitrates? Our evacuation at Love Canal? Remember the toxic-teeth scare, with the amalgam fillings leeching mercury into our gullets?..."

"We're making exiting advances in alternative car care."

"Forty years ago on this very seat I proposed to you. Made up your mind yet?"

'This is the same table we had when I proposed years ago. See? It still has my fingernail marks.'

"...And to love, cherish and occasionally look up from your phones at each other?"

"This is as romantic as when we were young and newly married, don't you think?"

"Forty years ago on this very seat I proposed to you. Made up your mind yet?"

"I can’t help it. I’m drawn to bad boys."

"No, I don't remember our wedding vows. Who remembers an argument 20 years ago?"