Repair Poet Gifts

"We're making exiting advances in alternative car care."

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

Jack of all trades

Tool Box

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

A DIY disaster.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

"I think I've fixed the intercom. Just remember to speak into the ceiling fan when the doorbell rings."

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

Ernie likes to fix things around the house. Just today he's fixed two sandwiches, three sundaes, and some microwave brownies.

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

'No, don't tell me, your electric garage door is broken.'

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

The world's most unemployable family

Lazy plumber.

Bob’s Museum

Computer operator welding machine.

'Certainly. Here's the break-down. Seventy-five dollars for my labour. And seventy-five dollars for you impersonating a plumber.'

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

'Your plasma screen TV needs a transfusion.'

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

"Never marry an engineer."

Poetry repairman

The Fuse

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."

'When last did you have your oil changed?'