Rock Collectors Gifts

"Personally, I think the world would be a safer place if everybody owned a rock."

TWO GUYS AND A ROCK

"He has moss on him. I think that's what they mean by 'Classic Rock.'"

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Well....I could've done this!"

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Old Geologists Never Die...they just switch to soft rock.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"I can't see a blinkin' thing."

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'Music & Gym'

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

Prepper Dog

Gramaphone Man.

"I feel that what would really give your next album a major boost would be some kind of well-publicized personal problem."

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Music Freak.

"My biggest concern is adequate closet space."

"I wonder what this was for."

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"I bought a fake rock to cover up this ugly rock."

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''