Ritual Humorists Gifts

"Do you mind Miss Trimble. I'm about to conduct a Christening."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

At the 2021 Religious Games

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

Ten Commandments

"I've heard great things about your church. Thought I would visit and say keep up the good work."

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

Guru.

Sermon Applause.

'Meaning of life? You bet! Here, pull my finger.'

'Please take your receipt!'

Single Prayer Health Insurance

"Does the ark have wifi?"

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

Praying Mantis.

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

Regifts of the Magi

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

OM, SWEET OM

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

"We're in deep trouble... there are some people quoting back to us what we taught them."

Religious Maintenance: 24 Hr Callout.

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'