Rising And Shining Champion Pillows

Alarmistclock

Businesswoman Empowerment

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

Joe's 'Talent-Optional' Karaoke Bar

First Prize!

Supermarket Warehouse. At night, with just security here, the products sing classic karaoke. The orange juice is belting Elvis'"All Shook Up." Peanut butter and jelly performed a duet of "Love Will Keep Us Together." children's breakfast cereal sang "Sugar, Sugar." And sriracha sauce did a rendition of "Great Balls of Fire"! What song will the ground beef choose? Jimmy Buffett's "Cheeseburger in Paradise," of course!

Woman puts a targeting sight on her vacuum cleaner.

Medalist wears five gold medals to form olympic rings.

And the crowd goes wild—except for Mary, because she wasn't paying attention.

Skateboard Olympics.

'You wouldn't listen to me. You have to buy the biggest tree in the lot!'

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

'It's no use ... I'll never catch anyone. I can't even catch my breath.'

Nature Scents Research Department.

Welcome to summer school.

A woman's work is never done.

Sign at Hospital: 'Road to Recovery ... Under Construction'

Dog show success

Rex grits his teeth, puts on his big boy pantaloons and gears up for the day ahead.

"4 a.m. and I'm raring to go to work."

'I've gone over the fight tapes and I think I've pinpointed your weakness.'

The future Muhammad Ali about to be conceived.

How was your college tour? Good. Now I need straight A's and 375 extracurriculars to get in. You're exaggerating. Easy for you to say. You've got a 4.0. Yeah, but

Competitions.

'You knew I was an amphibian when you married me!'

'Didn't you remove the bird before washing the cage?'

'The thing I liked best about being an amateur is that the other guy was an amateur too!'

"He wants to be beach buggy ready."

'I'm all in favour of alternative medicine, using boiled twigs and chanting has cut our drug budget in half.'

'But I can't take my muddy boots off - I'm not wearing any!'

"It wasn't as good as his first book, 'Eating Worms.'"

Buffing Cars.

"I'll go, but only if you promise we won't stay long."

'How to get mustard stains out of clothing? Excuse me while I call my mother!'