Riffing Reveler Gifts

Santana Claus

"Trust me, Lew, if anyone knows where the salmon are jumping, she does!"

"He took eight shots on the 19th hole!"

You're the olive in my martini

I Heart Dinosaurs Chef

'Well, I can't find anything in the rule book about it.'

Jenga!!!

"If we didn't send them out to recess after lunch, they wouldn't be full of solar energy all afternoon."

When I make it, I like to see it.

"200,000 other people have also highlighted this passage of the E-book, you common idiot."

My own museum.

Looks like you put too much dosie in that doe, Earl.

'It's an old football injury.'

"Hey! Your phone isn't turned on."

I think we're alone now!

Noel Fever

"And the crowd goes wild!! In all the wrongs ways."

Speleologist

Summer Sketches - View of the Seine near Asnières during the dog-days

1619: Valentine's Day

'I'm getting pretty tired of all these potholes.'

"Genuine? Of course it's genuine...zirconia."

'My next song is about a singer who should get into another line of work.'

'Wee Orlando just tagged his first bus shelter.' 'That's ma boy.'

Valentines

"A mighty fine cabernet, Zeke!"

Man Cleans His Reflections Teeth

"This charge is for your monthly service fee and this charge is because you didn't have it."

'There's been a mistake. I'm an atheist. I should now be surrounded by a great black nothingness.'

'I'm confused!'

'And the crowd goes wild! In all the wrong ways.'

'He's reached his limit with Government health advice.'

Sir Lancelot. Sir Rants-A-Lot.

'I see a labor union dispute coming.'

'He boogied till he puked.'