Ranting Reveler Gifts

Sir Lancelot. Sir Rants-A-Lot.

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

"Yee yee hee hee how how yip yip."

Santana Claus

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

Has he been smoking dope? Of course, how else do you think we get off the ground?

"If there's anything we can do to make your stay more pleasant, just rant about it all over the Internet."

'He's switched from tweeting on Twitter to growling on a new social media site called Growler. Suits him better.'

'Before we begin may I emit a prolonged rant about my work week?

"Don't worry, she's still alcohol aware."

'I'm hoping he'll move onto another subject...'

Spring Break!

'Wee Orlando just tagged his first bus shelter.' 'That's ma boy.'

Hiding in a cupboard for a few hours helped Tom survive the festive season.

'I'm getting pretty tired of all these potholes.'

Things-could-be-worse-go-round

"Happy National Pride Month."

Tuesday is drunken rant night. The noncommissioned officer is the backbone of this man's army!!!

Mort, sweetie, it's time for our lunch date. Can it wait? I'm in the middle of a rant. Why, that's no problem at all. In fact, I'd like to add something. But of course, my petunia. If I don't eat soon, Mort will never get another smooch! Who needs world order, really Another victory for Lip Gloss Diplomacy.

"The delight of an evening cocktail is hard to overstate."

Kissing Under The Misanthrope

"She's been looking forward to this for years - she even took dancing lessons!"

'He's whooping it up again.'

'I used to be ambitious, but I find it easier to feel guilty about lack of ambition.'

Happy Anniversary

"I can't remember whether or not I left hell on."

'There's been a mistake. I'm an atheist. I should now be surrounded by a great black nothingness.'

"Oh, nothing too exciting, Donna. I burned the toast last Wednesday, and on Saturday Jim split an infinitive. What's new with you?"

Lush.

'And as a committed Royalist you'd be witnessing this historic event at Westminster Abbey.... or the King's Head.'

So glad you decided to come out!

"He died the way he lived...angry at the news.

"Is it really an important message from your sponsor, or just another damn commercial?!"

'And the crowd goes wild! In all the wrong ways.'

'He's reached his limit with Government health advice.'