Returning From Retreat Gifts

"So how did you like getting away from it all?"

Steamed Room: "Man, I feel so much lighter."

'Are we there yet? Huh? Have we achieved Nirvana yet? Huh, have we?'

'It's great to get back to the simple life'

"And so another trip comes to an end...with family brought closer together by a shared experience."

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

Scurile travels

"I'm going on a retreat."

"To think—this meeting, which turned into the perfect day, filled with spontaneous adventures that will become priceless memories, could have been an e-mail."

Monk on the beach

Writer's Block Party

Priest

"That's it sorted then - this year we'll spend a fortnight in the spare bedroom."

"At last - no Trump."

'You know, if we had a bed and breakfast, we could use it ourselves!'

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

There's a toxic cloud moving in our direction! Hurry! Teddy's home from sports camp. Ha. Ha. Ha.

'Lost in the Jungle I found this Buddhist retreat...'

"Yes, it's half past two - is that all?"

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with worrying that you forget something."

Business acquaintances on holiday

'Today's Presentation: God's Miracles.'

"They're on a silent retreat."

"No thanks, I need time away from madness."

Spring Training

Busy thoughts of people at a silent retreat.

"I don't think there's enough vodka for another week in Canada."

'Becoming enlightened fifteen minutes before I did doesn't EITHER give you seniority!'

Go away

'Life size enlargements done here.' - 'Do my pictures of the pyramids please.'

"For quality control purposes, this phone call may be recorded and replayed for laughs at various office parties throughout our company."

"Fred, no one is going to bother you here. Put away the Bare Spray."

Missionary Statement: Spread the Word.

"Tuesday is my day off - leave a message..."

'Mother, are you sure your marijuana use is purely medicinal?'