Retro Toy Enthusiast Gifts

'If you lose your electrical charge before you get to a recharge, you just wind this.'

Jack-in-a-box popping out of a computer monitor.

"Show me how to use this dang iPad machine again, boy..."

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

"This doll doesn't do anything. . . is it dead?"

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

Director/Action Man toy.

Build your very own conflict of interest!

Diner.

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

The Missing Sock Returns

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"And this is our media room."

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

Rocking Horse

Early Colour TV

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

"Werewolves of London..."

Instructions for Bow Tie Wearers

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"It's his emotional support animal."

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

Computer Class.

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

Edison invents the personal stereo

"If we play house, Timmy, we can't live with my parents because..."

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

"If there's any one lesson we've learned from the eighties, it's how to shop!"

'It's an antique!'