Retail Visionary T-Shirts

"What do you think of the new window display?" "It's the first time we've ever shown a prophet."

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

'I want you to paddle against the current.'

'We need to change our luck. Let's move our headquarters to Redmond, the home of Microsoft.'

'Got to admit,as far as mission statements go, it's pretty damn bold.'

"I shop, therefore I am."

George doesn't really like me using the credit card.

A balloon seller is selling thought bubble balloons

"Hire me and I'll bring in orders. Big orders. You're gonna need a bigger door."

"Ya, right. Who needs a web presence. I'll just compete in the global economy from here."

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

"We finally found a way to bottle enthusiasm."

'I'm here to ask you for funding for my further development.'

It was a good chance to get together and talk shop.

Early man learns that by walking upright, his hands become free to do many useful things.

How it feels to be in a company with poor communication.

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

"Is it too late for me to stop poo pooing his expansion plan?"

"I suppose you're wondering why I've summoned you here at 3 AM, minion." "I try not to wonder." "After crunching the numbers, I've determined we'd increase profits by being open 24/7." "We're in the suburbs. Everyone's asleep." "Not true. By being closed at 3 AM, we're missing out on the potentially-lucrative Igor the Wino clientele." "Go to the alley and give Igor a 1-for-the-price-of-2 coupon." "Very bad man."

'Well, yes I can see there's definitely potential for growth.'

"C'mon. Just one more round of funding and I'll build you a horde that'll knock your socks off."

'I applied the instant rebate and the returning customer loyalty reward, so that comes to fifty cents.'

'I just invented business!'

"Nice. Got this in camo?"

Tell me the truth. Do you think my signature is logo-esque?

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

Brick and Mortar

"We only invest in companies that still exist a year after running a Super Bowl ad."

'So, Bob, I hear you've branched out!'

"I've simplified our work process!"

'I can dream, can't I?'

'Perhaps it's time we re-branded.'

When I was a youth, I dreamt of becoming a gangsta rapper who'd someday go legit and found a major record label and sell it for billions to Apple. Dr. Noodle. I never did it, though. I didn't know that career path was really possible. But then Dr. Dre cam along and he did it. That's an awfully specific dream you had. And then there was my Russian dream. I always dreamt of striking out in real estate, then catching the eye of Russian mobsters and foreign banks who'd bail me out if I agreed to lau