Retail Analysts Gifts

"After seeing the benefits of web analytics, Amy hoped to learn something by attaching cookies to customers who visited her store."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'We must grasp this new opportunity'

"Everything's gone up."

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

"I'm part of the problem and loving it!"

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

It was a good chance to get together and talk shop.

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

SupermarketAwful Market.

After the Nordstrom-Nordstream Merger

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

'Our giant sale now on!'

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

"Sorry, I'm late. I didn't realize how much credit you had on your card."

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."

'A penny for my thoughts. Now accepting all major credit cards.'

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

"Every good scene in that move was in the coming attractions...why did we even bother to come watch it?"

Sign on a sale bin at a bookstore that reads "Latte-Damaged Books".

'Water into wine is certainly impressive. D'you do water into petrol?'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

“There once was a woman who lived in a can of prebiotic soda… & only then did she consume enough to reap the health benefits claimed on the label.”

"Well SOME people might see it as buying a load of useless, overpriced rubbish but I see it as a brave attempt on my part to support a flagging retail sector."

A building covered in signs reading 'boats'.

"I've had a very trying day. I've tried on dresses, shoes..."

Stocktaker counts contents of baked-bean tins.

'Sale' 'Your money back if we feel like it'

"I invented 'shopping' and I haven't seen my wife since."

Dadonomics