Resume Recycler Gifts

'Her CV wasn't the only thing that was padded.'

'We heat the entire building by burning resumes.'

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

Queen of Upcycling!

"Don't just forage - upcycle!"

Maybe clean out your wallet

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

Video Henge: made from melting and molding 3,000,000 obsolete VCR tapes.

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

Personnel. Any experience in crisis management? No...Just production.

'Alright, throw in your resume and the 'Get A Job' potion will be complete.'

"You inhabit the body of someone who has an impressive résumé."

"But what you call a track record I call ancient history."

"Can you believe Jim made all the furniture out of old rubbish?"

"Well, your CV certainly contains some very impressive name dropping."

'This resume is incredible. Would you be able to lie this well under pressure?'

'Next time you want to cheat and use someone else's resume, I suggest you do more than scratch out his name and put yours above it.'

Burt was a true artist and conservationist. He recycled his beer cans...Making an ornate garden wall and rockery.

Recycling centre

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

"These references are excellent Mr. Canning. But do you have any from someone other than your mother?"

Personnel Manager to applicant: 'Your resume and references are excellent, but your hair is too silly.'

'Muriel makes all her own clothes out of junk mail.'

"I've been an accountant, an actuary, an advertising exec, an administrator, an architect, an art director, and an auditor, and now I'd like to move on to the B's."

"It's a pretty good resume, but I would have like to see more bells and whistles."

"When did you say you left school?"

'We're looking for someone who either has a good background or can concoct a good story about one.'

'This resume is incredible. Would you be able to lie this well under pressure?'

"I see by your resume, you don't stay in one place long."

'Your CV is a work of pure fiction...'

'Very impressive, but is there anything you can't do?'

'i had no idea filling the manager position would be so much fun!'

"Sorry, but you're overqualified."

"Before I give you my resume, I'd like to know how thorough you fact check."

"I've up cycled your Chippendale!"