Resignation Anniversary Gifts

"First they outsourced my job, and then they outsourced me."

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

"You're quitting? You're walking out?? Couldn't you have at least waited until I finished outsourcing the company??!"

"This is bad work, Edwards! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!"

The Monroe Doctrine

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

Best Scapegoat

"Goodbye, Cruikshank. We leave you to contemplate the wisdom of messing with big dog!"

'I was a taxi driver once but I resigned!' 'Why?' 'I hate people talking behind my back.'

Rent-a-car! We pick you up

"I'm surprised, Caswell. I thought you were a happy camper."

"I'm working part time, but I'm hoping that once I finish my master's they'll up my hours to full time."

"Well, yes, we did have to downsize operations a bit ... "

"I see you've flown around the world in a plane, and settled revolutions in Spain. Around a golf course you're under par. Metro-Goldwyn has asked you to star. Very impressive, I must admit, but we're looking for someone with marketing experience."

'This resume is incredible. Would you be able to lie this well under pressure?'

"Hate to see you leave—you were my favorite puppet."

You realize, Harris, if you LIVED here, you'd be home by now.

'Coach, were you forced to resign? ...'

"I see you have extensive wood chuckery experience."

"Hey...Didn't we build that?"

"Geoffrey always was a bit of a loose cannon.."

"I take it you're not heartbroken to be leaving the firm!"

'...and please remember, if I HAD a door, it would always be open for you.'

"It's my resignation in the form of a graphic novel."

Gladstone Steps Down as Liberal Leader

"You had the persistence to wind your way through our labyrinthian phone system to ask for an interview...you're hired!"

'I'm resigning -- so voters won't get the satisfaction of kicking me out of office!'

"I quit."

"We hired him for his soft paws - I mean soft skills."