Resignation Reveler Gifts

"I take it you're not heartbroken to be leaving the firm!"

'My feet are killing me.'

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

"He took eight shots on the 19th hole!"

"I say we move on to dessert."

'Well, I can't find anything in the rule book about it.'

"I quit."

"If we didn't send them out to recess after lunch, they wouldn't be full of solar energy all afternoon."

Nuclear Fusion Reactor - Our Founder.

'Let him go. We'll catch him in the backstretch. Hippos can run faster than humans, but only in short bursts.'

'Well the GOOD news is that the new software analyzed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product...'

'Dang! The Hoopers have been force-feeding vitamins again.'

'You haven't changed a bit Perkins.'

'It's an old football injury.'

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

"I didn't think you'd make it through biology."

Two inebriated friends meet, one says: 'Hello, I've not seen you since you were this high.'

Noel Fever

"Same thing every morning. Crack of Don at the crack of dawn."

"And the crowd goes wild!! In all the wrongs ways."

'Before you get carried away with celebrating, Stapleton, I'd like to remind you that my retirement doesn't go into effect until five o'clock...and I'm still your supervisor.'

'Have you noticed it, too?'

'Yeahh...I remember you...You're that...one guy.'

'I'm writing a poem -- what rhymes with 'hegemony'?'

'Regrets? Not many, except for this list of individuals that I had the misfortune of hiring...'

'Walter just retired after 37 years at the shoe store.'

Topsy-Turveydom

'Oh, that...sure I'd like to take a fling at that and then quit'

'Case dismissed! -- I just reached retirement age!'

Every Night is Over 60's Night

"This is our successful 'Flat Broke Bum' designer suit. Lots of investment bankers and car plant CEO's ordered it!"

'Methuselah's really depressed -- He's the only one who showed up for his high school reunion.'

'Wee Orlando just tagged his first bus shelter.' 'That's ma boy.'