Resignation Stories Gifts

Nothing to Lose

It was getting worse. Bob's power suit kept wanting more and more, whereas Bob just wanted out.

"Sorry, Foster, but I'm letting you go. I just downloaded the 'Scapegoat' app."

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

"You're quitting? You're walking out?? Couldn't you have at least waited until I finished outsourcing the company??!"

"My God! There goes middle management."

Best Scapegoat

'You're resigning? What great timing! I was going to lay you off friday!'

"So finally, the liarbird flew off to the lucrative world of tell-all books, management consultancy and after-dinner speaking..."

'Being a nobody isn't so bad...You don't have to worry about becoming a has-been.'

'I was a taxi driver once but I resigned!' 'Why?' 'I hate people talking behind my back.'

"I'm surprised, Caswell. I thought you were a happy camper."

"I want to quit, spend more time with my family, finish grade 3....."

'Coach, were you forced to resign? ...'

"Where do you see yourself getting drunk in five years?"

"Geoffrey always was a bit of a loose cannon.."

"Hate to see you leave—you were my favorite puppet."

"I take it you're not heartbroken to be leaving the firm!"

'...and please remember, if I HAD a door, it would always be open for you.'

'Our Anesthesiologist resigned recently.'

'Not for what I'm getting paid!'

"It's my resignation in the form of a graphic novel."

Gladstone Steps Down as Liberal Leader

'I'm resigning -- so voters won't get the satisfaction of kicking me out of office!'

"By the way, I'm giving notice I start at Hooters on Monday."

'I don't think I'm getting paid enough either, Osgood - Let's both quit!'

"I quit."

"There's a rumour that someone may be resigning today."

'Hoskins, I'd like to congratulate you on your leadership initiative... and if I didn't feel threatened, I'd keep you on.'

'Does that mean you found a new job, Hirshenson?'

'All right! All right! Parker. But you'll have to confirm your resignation in writing too.'

"I can't work for you anymore. My doctor said I'm allergic to nuts."

'I always said he was on the fast track.'

"I told him that I was leaving, that I couldn't put up with the endless stream of meaningless paperwork...he asked me to fill out an exit report!"

'I'm resigning due to fiscal mismanagement...so my last act as CEO is to give myself a big severance package.'