Report Card Comedies Gifts

Parent/Teacher conjugation

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

"In economics, I got an IOU."

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

Something tells me it's not going to be a good school report!

"Remember, history was easier back in your day. There's so much more of it now."

"I got all Z's because I fell asleep in class."

"I was finishing my homework in the shower to save time!"

'I have answers to the kind of questions no one likes to ask.'

'Let's put it this way Tommy, if we could go below F minus you would be forging new territory!'

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

"I passed the three R's. Now I need some R and R!"

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

"I thought those D's meant dedicated!"

"The whole neighborhood has an opinion on who the next pope should be."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

"How would I explain the 'D' in debate class? Probably not very well."

"Would anyone like to say any final words about Carl from accounting?"

"These fourth grade marks are confusing...I got a B on the assignment, so is that like a smiley face or a star?"

"You told me not to bring home another bad report card so I brought home Billy's."

Rip Van Winkle, "He's survived the operation, now he's sleeping peacefully."

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

'How could you flunk multiplication?'

'And it's not just me...Ms. Anthrope doesn't seem to like anyone.'

'Columbus might not have sailed over the edge, but I did.'

"Sorry I'm late with my grades. I was busy removing the 'Honor Roll' bumper sticker from the car."

"But it did take hard work to get my A, B, C and D in that order down the card."