Religion Readers Gifts

"Woo! Three new followers!"

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

Trappist Monk Discord

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"Moses, some of the people are requesting gluten free manna."

"Commandments aren't really selling these days. However, we're willing to consider self-help tips or personal improvement ideas."

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

The ecumenical dinner party.

10 Commitments? Sure, I guess I could give him those, too.

'Nothing about the evils of corporate downsizing?'

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"What did Jesus order?"

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

'You always talk about robbing Peter to pay Paul, but you never mention Mary.'

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

Holy Bible

This will really mess with their minds someday.

'Wait a minute... What the heck is frankincense?'

Catholic-Protestant Debates. . .

Adam and Eve in Paradise

"You're correct, God doesn't need your tithe, but the church does."

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

"Two for Bethlehem, I assume you want a Virgin flight."

'So, I take it that diversity isn't a priority?'

Attila the Nun.