Religion Reviewer Gifts

Christian school student tries to change subject.

"Prebish, we usually limit our Comparative Religions course to the more reputable religions."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

'You always talk about robbing Peter to pay Paul, but you never mention Mary.'

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

THE ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI SHOW.

Chill Out Worshippers!

"If atheism is a religion, why hasn't it broken up into splinter groups who murder each other?"

How's my Sermon . . .

The Pope looks through here to check out the crowd before he speaks. Ah --- The papal people peephole!

A Man of Faith

Pastoring for Dummies

'Is it organic?'

Best Seller of All Times...The Holy Bible:'No fair. You're creating your own readers.'

Framed dollar in church secretary office says 'Our First Offering'

"Did we get the line item veto?"

"An apple? Doesn't he have any pizza?"

'I warned you we'd get thrown out, changing the name from the Garden of Eden.'

Trump Bible photo op

'It's a popular misconception, but in fact, it's always been 'cod'.'

Tickets being sold for the Fun House and the Religious Fundamentalist House,

'Okay, just be patient -- it could be months before they learn to obey all of these.'

"And Adam and Eve saw that they were naked, and they were ashamed."

Alcoholics drink alone... or with others!

"I have to confess a sin, Preacher. I went premarital shopping."

"They're really more like a bucket list."