Religion Revisitor Gifts

"Genesis" "*The King Gus Version"

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

"Well, we needed the rain."

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

'You always talk about robbing Peter to pay Paul, but you never mention Mary.'

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

'THAT'S the Holy Land? - You're kidding, right?'

95 Theses That Will Blow Your Mind!

Religion & Economics.

"Just my luck."

"If God had intended us to fly in jets, He would have seen to it that the Wright Brothers invented jets."

'Psst, buddy -- Apocrypha!'

Pastoring for Dummies

Virgin MaryExtra Virgin Mary.

'If it's all the same to you, we'd prefer not to get involved.'

"Lucifer, if you want your own bedroom you're going to have to move into the basement."

'Damn, we forgot to cancel the book of the month!'

"OK, so you've told us what God thinks... but now I'd like to know what YOU think!"

"They're really more like a bucket list."

Vicar losing his place in the sermon.

'Have your daily bread every other day.'

Don't get too close to Brother Jerome - he just baptized a Hun.

'Now they're not set in stone...'