Religion Analyst Gifts

Equal Time for All Christians

"They're really more like a bucket list."

"Religion is all about love, peace and forgiveness and if you don't believe it, God's revenge will befall you and you'll burn in eternal damnation and suffer torments of hell!"

"Did you know the Church of Satan has a zero-tolerance policy against pedophiles? I'm not a member, of course, I'm just saying."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

"Well, we needed the rain."

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

The World's Biggest Book Club

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

"Just my luck."

Religion & Economics.

Worst. God. Ever.

95 Theses That Will Blow Your Mind!

'Psst, buddy -- Apocrypha!'

"If God had intended us to fly in jets, He would have seen to it that the Wright Brothers invented jets."

Does Christianity have the monopoly on morality?

Oh, @#$%, is that

Holy Roller Church: We accept all denominations, but we are especially fond of $20, $50, $100, & $500...

Virgin MaryExtra Virgin Mary.

'If it's all the same to you, we'd prefer not to get involved.'

'Damn, we forgot to cancel the book of the month!'

Tickets being sold for the Fun House and the Religious Fundamentalist House,

"Lucifer, if you want your own bedroom you're going to have to move into the basement."

Religion, This End Up

'Ever since we converted the church into a jail, everyone is finding Jesus.'

"I have to confess a sin, Preacher. I went premarital shopping."

'Fourteenth century church, fourteenth century views.'

Vicar losing his place in the sermon.