Religion Critic Gifts

'Who knew there was such a fine line between prosperity theology and wretched excess?'

Why Hast Bush Forsaken Us?

The 30% Solution

Jeb Bush is a Devout Catholic

Donald Trump's Commandments

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

Presbyterian Butler

Pope and crocodile

Catholic priest reading 'Preyboy' Magazine.

Priest to congregation, "I'm no different to you just because I wear a dog collar."

'I am God's messenger! . . . Give God's messenger money!'

"The 'F' in 'Bible' stands for facts."

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"I don't believe in religion, but I'm in awe of it. Scribble some stories, fabricate a few relics, exploit people's fears... What do you get?... Money... Power... ...And all the children you'd care to molest."

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

"You atheists wouldn't exist without God!"

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

"I've founded my own religion." "Of course you have, Rudy." "It's off to a good start. Already, it's being mocked by people of other faiths." "If history's any guide, within a couple hundred years, it'll be widely accepted and people who don't believe in it will be persecuted." "What are the central tenets of your religion?" "A true Rudian knows that life is suffering, and winning arguments online is salvation."

'I'll decide what I forbid, okay?'

The Pope

Does Christianity have the monopoly on morality?

"Pastor, since you refuse to respond to my emails I decided to print off a list of all my objections to your messages."

Worst. God. Ever.

Holy Roller Church: We accept all denominations, but we are especially fond of $20, $50, $100, & $500...

"It was a little preachy."

A Man of Faith

"They're really more like a bucket list."

"I think it's the company logo."

You're too enamored of wealth, Al. As it says in the Bible, "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle that for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." Is that a regular Camel, or does it have a filter tip?

"Daddy says God created Eve out of Adam´s spare credit card!"

'Fourteenth century church, fourteenth century views.'

"Never go to a church during a hurricane. They only provide shelter from taxes."

Obey the Book or be damned!