Religion Detective Gifts

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

"I see you're back from church. What was cherry-picked for you today?"

The World's Biggest Book Club

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

'Okay - who leaked?'

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

The joy of sects.

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

'Wow! -- Talk about family values!'

Religion & Economics.

'Psst, buddy -- Apocrypha!'

"Just my luck."

Mouse with map exiting maze.

'If it's all the same to you, we'd prefer not to get involved.'

"They're really more like a bucket list."

Remote-controlled Popemobile.

"OK, so you've told us what God thinks... but now I'd like to know what YOU think!"

Vicar losing his place in the sermon.

Don't get too close to Brother Jerome - he just baptized a Hun.

"Perhaps we should accept her invitation to church. Then ask the priest questions during the sermon."

"What's this, a confession written in code. . .?"

I'm not sure asceticism is a relative concept Brother Michael

"I'm calling it 'Genesis.' It's part of a five-book contract."

Today's Sermon: If you're unhappy with government intervention, try divine intervention.

Progressions.

When policewomen date.

Philipp Melanchthon (Lutherism)

'Is there a backup plan?'

"It's part of His new diversity program."