Research Detective Gifts

Mouse with map exiting maze.

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

STRIP Hambone: Fix it yourself

"Here...let me call an expert...someone who knows about these things."

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.

"It seemed like a long timeout."

A Young Boy Talking To An Old Gentleman.

Newton's Law and Order.

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

Micro and Macro Department,

"Your curriculum vitae is extremely detailed, isn't it? I don't quite know what to make of the fact that your third-grade teacher, Miss Hartley, made you stand in the corner for throwing an eraser although another kid did it."

Don't forget to read the small print.

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

"Do you swear you haven't embroidered the truth in your testimony today?"

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help the Google?"

"You say in your resume that you're very meticulous."

Devil in the detail

"I just audited our books. Your register came up five cents short, Rudy."

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

"Where would we BE without the right DOCUMENTATION...?"

'I had laser eye surgery and I still can't find the remote.'

'My school has a very strict detention policy.'

"Is it my imagination, or does our use of correction fluid increase as people's teeth get whiter?"

"We need to talk about procrastination."

"Before I give you my resume, I'd like to know how thorough you fact check."

Files of Doom

"Play the last presidential debate....hold on....first take our all the lies and stuff..."

When pedants take a break.

I spy with my little eye in the sky …

'Talk about paranoid. He reads the fine print on his money.'