Relationship Expert Appreciator Pillows

"So let's talk about my self-importance, I'll start."

Sauvignon Bonk

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

Paint pots in love

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

Their relationship was doomed to fail. She was frigid, and his arms were too short to rub one out.

Urns in love

(Man with 'BEFORE sign): 'My wife says I'm a work-in-progress.'

'You've changed since we got married.'

Nothing to say! Wouldn't wanna hear about it anyway!

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

"Ours will be the first mixed marriage in my family. Dog people NEVER marry cat people."

'It took me years of training, but now he's my perfect man.'

"I'm not laughing at you, dear-I'm laughing with everyone but you."

"Maybe what she really wants you to do is rub her tummy."

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

His and Hers Wedding

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

An evening with Stanley Bucholtz, relationship MD,,,tonight: 'Just ONE evening,,,'

'Here's to being in love, in a hurry, and in debt.'

Couple kissing by a 'Ped Xing and Oing' sign.

"I've never, ever taken you for granted, Ingrid."

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

Growing Love

Speech-bubble-head-boy loves think-bubble-head-girl.

'I don't know about you, but he was really beginning to get on my nerves.'

Tunnel of Love and the Tunnel of Mutual Respect and Admiration.

'Okay, we grew old together - Now what?'