Record Agent Gifts

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Mum, I got the job!"

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"Stanley, this is a historic moment. We've discovered the world's longest kiss. Guinness Book of Records here we come!"

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

Meet Santa's entourage

'Somebody should tell our office manager that a motorized filing cabinet does not qualify as an electronic health record system.'

Snow White and her Seven people.

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

"This next song is about narrow-minded record executives and their reluctance to take a chance on anything a bit different."

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

'Therapy in L.A.'

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

'Michelle's Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms'

'Music & Gym'

"You're looking at the next Bob Dylan."

Gramaphone Man.

Dive in Archive.

'I have Tourette's, and they play backup.'

"It seems our precious three year old hacked into the White House with his playtime computer!"

"My agent."

'It's 'big office' meets 'poorly-received flop'!'

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

Hollywood, 2083.

'I told you I'd make you a star.'

'It's another office memo from that Mr. Tolstoy.'

"A P.R. Intern Named Salome with the Head Shot of John the Client."