Recall Humorist Gifts

"Harry got a recall notice."

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

Apples for sale

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Vlad the Impala

"There's only one 'L' in colosseum."

Mount Olympus Brewery. Those might be dangerous to open. They're Pandora's Bocks.

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

"When are they going to change the 'feature'?"

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

"Right here's fine."

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

"Can Olaf come out to pillage and plunder?"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

The discovery of asparagus.

What's an Imax cave?

It isn't widely known that Michelangelo was the first in a long line of cartoonists to buck the family tradition.

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

Stonehenge Explained

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

"Suddenly, you’re a fan of New England stone work?"

"Yours is adjustable?"

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

The Fall of Gnome

"You're stealing from the rich and selling it to the poor on Craigslist?"

This side is the gag reel.

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.