Retro Humorist Gifts

'Stupid woman - of course I watch television, what else are you supposed to do with it???'

Stone Age women were less happy than men at the arrival of the iron age: Look what I've invented just for you darling.

"You schlepped with her, didn't you?"

"I discovered coffee!"

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

'I don't think Charlie will ever get used to these auto-mobiles.'

Woman Ironing Contraceptives.

We are downsizing due to the merger of our hunting and gathering divisions.

'And best of all, it kills germs that cause bad breath!'

'He invented the wheel, then took it for a spin.'

Note on computer for milkman.

'You have chain mail.'

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

Warning! This classic 70's comedy contains humour.

"Oh, now I remember you. You used to be fun-size, right?"

'This is all so uncool! I forgot to charge my cell phone so I'm using the public default phone.'

"A family car you say, seats four?"

Top shelf magazines 'Hard', 'Soft' & 'Crumbly'

'Effin' English - that wasn't one of my best subjects either son.'

'It's something he calls IRS.'

Colour version "Never forget a face-we met on the same telephone wire-Hitchcock film...what was the name?

'You Brute! Just look what your head's done to my rolling pin...'

Sell us fire policy...our house made of stone.

Citizens Advice: "*!*X!! OFF!"

A dinosaur, a bearded man and a man on a swing

The Moe Howard Installation

"Do people kick each other in the shins anymore? Is that still a thing?" "Hmmm, I'm not sure. Are there still dogcatchers with big nets?" The Adventures of Jim and Barney *Tune in next time for more action!*

"Don't make me turn this covered wagon around!"

"Release our vaults from these thy vises, We've done our time in Hell; And lead us out these endless crises Of the troubled S. & L.s."

"How old is a Major?"

"My, it feels good to sit down."