Retro Humor Gifts

Citizens Advice: "*!*X!! OFF!"

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

'Ha! Ha! The Wooin' O't!'

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

Stone Age women were less happy than men at the arrival of the iron age: Look what I've invented just for you darling.

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

'I hunt and I gather. I invented multitasking.'

"Don't make me turn this covered wagon around!"

'Hey! You're not for real, are you man?'

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

A child with a parasol is blown off the Chain Pier in Brighton

'Do you ever get this weird, primitive yearning to sit behind a large block of wood?'

Trump to Build Wall

"My, it feels good to sit down."

'I don't think Charlie will ever get used to these auto-mobiles.'

'See? I've got a rock AND a stick! -- I've invented MULTITASKING!'

We are downsizing due to the merger of our hunting and gathering divisions.

"Hatless" Bill Johnson

"You remind me of myself - you know - a while ago."

"Roots, figs, water, mammoth meat, and... um... Ugh! Me never remember shopping list!"

"Hurry up with that cork!"

"Honey, your radon testing kit is here."

"It's a cereal box. It's not supposed to be interactive!"

Jackie Gleason's Old Desk: Trays read: InOutPow, right in the kisser.

"Cap'n crunches"

"Don't you ever miss the hustle and bustle of the old tar pits?"

How We Know You're Getting Old

The Moe Howard Installation